
04 Aug Is the Pursuit of Happiness Making You Unhappier?
Just another ladder to climb, another thing to buy, just one more minute of the day. When you see life this way, it becomes a vague representation of acquisition; it becomes an endless list of “just one more thing and I can be happy.”
The pursuit of happiness can be a classic paradoxical experience, wherein when people are actively seeking it to compensate for negative emotions, the more happiness eludes them.
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Is The Constant Pursuit of Happiness Doing More Harm?
A 2025 study revealed that the more people intentionally pursue positive emotions, the less happiness they actually experience. The act of constantly chasing happiness may even impact our mental and physical health.
True happiness is not found through the increase in positive emotions and a decrease in negative ones. The study discussed that it is found through having a balanced mind, regardless of the type of emotions they are feeling.
In addition, experts noted that when people constantly seek happiness, they have an assumption that they are unhappy in some way or even have a defect.
Experts noted that feelings of inadequacy just perpetuate the notion that they are lacking something, leading to a pattern and eventually a pattern that becomes harder to break.
As a result, people set unrealistic happiness goals instead and make themselves feel different, instead of going with the flow of their emotions.
Mental health experts added that the active pursuit of happiness is costing us mental resources.
A 2025 study noted that trying to be happier empties one’s ability to use self-control and willpower, making us more susceptible to temptations and engaging in self-destructive behaviors.
Excessive focus on trying to be happier can even lead to:
- Increased feelings of anxiety
- Feelings of depression
- Disappointments
- Low moods
So, How Can We Actually Be Happier?
There is no single fit-all formula for happiness. At a certain point, negative emotions are something you need to ride out.
The question, instead of asking how to be happier, should be how to create more space for your emotions.
To feel without judgment, here are some things you can try to do:
- Accept your emotions without any intention of avoiding them
- Take a deep breath
- Find an outlet to express yourself
- Be around trusted people
- Seek professional help if it feels necessary
At iCare, the best affordable HMO in the Philippines, we believe that well-being isn’t just about avoiding illness. It’s about embracing your emotional and mental health, too.
That’s why more HR leaders from top employers trust iCare to provide holistic healthcare support to their teams. The best employers know that mental health is a vital part of total wellness.
Chasing good feelings isn’t always the same as pursuing your better health goals. But listening to your emotions, riding the waves, and honoring your inner experience, these can lead you to a more grounded, empowered version of yourself.
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