06 Oct Your Brain is Listening: What You Tell Yourself Shapes Your Identity, Even Your Quality of Health

Sometimes you are not your best ally. You might be the first one to throw a criticism, withhold praise, and even downplay your own achievements. What you constantly tell yourself—may it be positive or negative talk—can shape your identity, health, and even your reality.  

Self-talk, also known as your inner voice, is characterized by how you talk to yourself. Your inner voice can help you process experiences, make decisions, and ask questions. It can also be harmful if you focus on negative self-talk.  

The Role of Self-Talk in One’s Health  

A 2024 study concluded that adolescents who practice positive self-talk experience good reactions to positive emotions.  

Positive self-talk was also found to help build one’s self-confidence, motivation, and improve mental health.  

The study also further noted that positive self-talk can help adolescents build a strong foundation and successful personal development in the future.  

Positive self-talk or affirmations can help lift psychological barriers to change by buffering against threat and reducing defensive adaptations, according to a 2025 study.  

In addition, affirmations can help create a positive narrative of “personal adequacy” during challenging times, even promote change.  

Self-affirmations can also help restore self-competence when threatened by reflecting on sources of self-worth, such as core values.  

Meanwhile, negative self-talk can trigger performance anxiety, detachment, somatic fatigue, and self-blame.  

It can also cause:  

• Increased stress  

• Reduced success  

• Perfectionism  

• Feelings of depression  

• Relationship challenges  

How Do I Get Better at Self-Talk  

Positive self-talk not only fosters a positive image of oneself; it also helps an individual to develop a sense of self-trust.  

When you talk to yourself better, you allow yourself to be better.  

To start doing positive self-talk or positive affirmation, here are some things you can do:  

• Write the positive things about yourself: reflect and write the things you believe to be positive about yourself. It can also be something that you want to believe in or embed in the core of your being, including comforting words like “everything will be alright,” “I am safe,” or “I am allowed to be wrong and be better at it next time.”  

• Tell yourself the words repeatedly: make it a daily habit and make your brain listen to yourself regularly, saying positive things. Repetition is important in creating a new belief within yourself.  

You can also foster positive self-talk by catching yourself becoming a critic and remembering that your thoughts are not always factual.  

To develop self-compassion, you can also catch your critic and question it by thinking like your own friend. Sometimes it is easier to say comforting words to a friend than to yourself. When moments of negative self-talk come, treat yourself as you would treat a friend.  

It also helps to think long-term and shift your perspective—is it something that will matter to you in five or 10 years? If not, is it something worthy of rumination?  

When you challenge yourself to change your perspective, you challenge yourself to be better. Choosing better will always come with a different kind of hardship, but the question is, are you willing to go through the hardship of being better or staying the same?  

At iCare, we recognize the need to be better; to change when it will help our partners and members.  

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SOURCES:  

Mulawarman Mulawarman, Eni Rindi Antika, Sigit Hariyadi, Achmad Miftachul Ilmi, Abi Fa’izzarahman Prabawa, Pautina, A. R., Dini Chairunnisa, Benu, K. M., Galuh Nadhita, Alvia Ainil Lathifah, & Yuliana, V. (2024). Positive Self-Talk in Adolescent: A Systematic Literature Review. Bulletin of Counseling and Psychotherapy, 6(3). https://doi.org/10.51214/002024061034000  

‌ Novia Angelina Zuraidy. (2025). Positive Affirmation Self-Talk, Impacts on Well-Being, When and How to Start Doing it. International Journal of Social Health, 4(1), 24–31. https://doi.org/10.58860/ijsh.v4i1.279  

Scott, E. (2023, November 22). The Toxic Effects of Negative Self-Talk. Verywell Mind. https://www.verywellmind.com/negative-self-talk-and-how-it-affects-us-4161304  

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